Another Messed up Story
by theallpowerfullme
Summary: SasuNaru Mpreg. Can everyone last the whole nine months protecting, handling and such, a pregnant Naruto?
1. It worked

**Yeah.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Especially Naruto or anything underlined throughout this story.**

**Warning: Mpreg, yaoi, possible sex scenes/wet dreams, some TemaHina and that's all that I can think of right now, oh and kind of spoilers.**

* * *

"Is it me or has Sasuke become a little more protective of Naruto lately? I mean he won't let him go on any missions and like, that whole cheese episode this morning was really freaky." Hinata and Shino nodded at Kiba's comment as they walked together to the Hokage tower for a mission. 

-This morning-

Everyone was gathered around Naruto who was crying with a can of cheese in his hand. (you know that canned Easy Cheese stuff you spray on crackers)

"Na-naruto-kun what's w-wrong?" Hinata asked gently.

"I-i, _I can't find the cap to my cheese!_" Naruto cried even harder.

"Na-na-Naruto-kun, Shino-kun, K-kiba-kun and I will help look f-for it." She cooed and Shino and Kiba nodded vigorously.

"R-really?" Hinata nodded. Naruto smiled softly.

"Oi, dobe there you are." They turned to see Sasuke walking towards them with something orange in hand.

"Teme?" Sasuke came up to him and held out his hand with the orange cheese can top. "YAY! You found the cap!" Naruto took it overly happy for such a petty thing and hugged the can.

"Thanks teme!" Hinata and everyone watched as Naruto skipped away and Sasuke followed with a sigh.

-Now-

"Do you think Naruto hit his head too hard and Sasuke was put on the mission to take care of him because no one else wanted it and it was more punishment for leaving those years?" Kiba voiced.

"N-no, I don't th-think so." Hinata looked at her watch for the tenth time that morning.

"We're not gonna be late Hinata, stop worrying."

"T-that's not it..." Kiba and Shino looked at the girl and looked away. What with everyone these days?

♥♥♥You're so jealous of my hearts♥♥♥

"I don't believe you Sasuke! How could you do that? How do you think Naruto will feel when we tell him 'Hey, Naruto, guess what? Sasuke gave you a pill he created to make you pregnant, and well, now you're pregnant!'"

"That's why I _asked_ him first." Sasuke spat back at Tsunade.

"You asked him?" She asked. Sasuke nodded. "Naruto, come in here."

Naruto walked into the room. "Yeah baa-chan?"

"Did you know Sasuke gave you a pill to get pregnant?"

"You mean it worked? Sasuke, I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant!" Naruto bounced around. Sasuke came up from behind and wrapped his arms around his waist.

"Really?" He whispered, "That's wonderful. Do you think it will be a girl or a boy?" Tsunade rolled her eyes.

"Ooooooh! I hope it's a girl, but if it a boy that's just as good!" Sasuke chuckled and Naruto ranted on about how wonderful their child would be.

"Naruto, I guess we have to hold off your training for Hokage until afterwards..." Naruto stopped ranting. The two boys looked over at Tsunade.

"The elders said yes?" Tsunade nodded.

"Sasuke, I'm going to become a Hokage!" Naruto paused, "AND I'm going to have a baby!"

Sasuke chuckled again and kissed Naruto's cheek. "That's _amazing._" Sasuke cooed and dragged the happy man home.

♥♥♥♥♥Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee♥♥♥♥♥

Sakura and Ino watched as Sasuke dragged the overly happy blond down the street. Naruto had been acting strange lately. They walked over but stopped when the blond started to look more serious.

"I told you I don't want eggs with ketchup and chocolate syrup right now, I want pickles with black jack cherry ice cream mixed with ramen!" What a disgusting combo...

"Naruto...alright then can you walk home without being distracted, kidnapped or hurt in any way, shape, or form?"

"Sasuke, I'll be fine! Plus I'll be super extra careful now that I know that I'm-" Sasuke covered his mouth.

"Shh...unless you mind letting everyone know." Naruto nodded and Sasuke let go. "Now get home safe I just gotta go get some groceries for your cravings." Naruto nodded again and Sasuke walked off.

Sakura and Ino nodded to each other. Sakura went after Naruto and Ino went after Sasuke.

* * *

I hope you enjoyed, review♥ 

This chapter has been beta'd! -Little reminder to the beta;;


	2. good cookin'

Weeeeeeee dont we all feeeeel sooooooo special? I do! Im updating cuz ive read all the non dying of characters stories that are SasuNaru and NOT and i repeat **NOT **(note big bold letters) Nar...nar..I can't even type it so im gonna put space...N...a...r...u...s...a...s...Its toooooooo much I cant do it I absolutely dispise it! i dispise it more then pink (an if you ask my friends how much i hate they'll laugh and tell you how I clawed at my friends door when they threw a pi...pi...PINK birthday party for me) so anyways on with story! ♥

* * *

Sakura's green eyes danced around at Naruto's every movement. Her ears would pick up humming and then slight murmuring until another tune came from Naruto's throat. Naruto's hair bounced up and down as he skipped to his destination. But where was his destination? Was it Sasuke's house? No, Naruto must have moved somewhere nearby. Then again... 

Sakura shook her head at set her sight on Naruto. The boy stopped for a moment and seemed to concentrate on some. He turned in a 135 degree angle towards her. _Oh no, did he find me? _Sakura looked around and waited for Naruto to start asking her questions.

But no, Naruto just picked a flower from the bush under the branch she sat upon and continued down the gravel path. He held a huge smile and was humming once again.

Sakura sat back and sighed, she was almost caught. Getting focused once again she followed the bouncing bundle of happiness to...the Uchiha compound? Was he really living with Sasuke?

Naruto's small tan hand found itself wandering through the jumpsuit pocket searching for the key. A pink tongue stuck out in concentration as the hand moved back and forth in the fabricated holder of money and such. A smiled replaced the look as he brought out the key and inserted it into the lock.

Sakura jumped down from the tree and walked to the door Naruto had just entered and closed, and she knocked.

"One moment please!" Was the hooded shout. Sakura waited and leaned her weight to her left before the door finally opening to see Naruto drying off his hands."Sakura-chan!"

"Hello, Naruto. Is Sasuke-kun here?"

"Nope. He's at the store I'm gonna make dinner would you like some tea or something? Oh, stoopid me come in!" Naruto sounded like an old single lady living a content life! Did he feel okay?

Sakura didn't notice how cold it was getting until she walked into the heated house. She walked behind Naruto to the kitchen; as she walked by she noticed more color then she had thought for Sasuke to have.

"Here, peppermint tea!" Naruto set a cup a tea pot and a cup of sugar on the table. He walked back to the counter, his hips rocked slightly side to side as one foot was put in front of the other. Naruto picked up the knife and started to chop and slice some vegetables, humming an off beat tune.

Sakura took a sip of the tea and watched as Naruto poured some oil into a heating frying pan. A few moments later as the oil hissed against the heat, Naruto put added onions and peppers into the pan and left them, taking a break now and again from de-boning the already cooked chicken, he took the turner and moved the veggies around.

Sakura smelled the delightful aroma of of the cooking, and heard a slight step. She looked over to the entrance of the kitchen to see Sasuke smiling, holding a bag of groceries. He put his finger to his lips. Sakura watched almost paralyzed as Sasuke continued to smile.

Naruto started to rock his body to the beat he was humming, forgetting about the quiet Sakura. He spun around and stopped. His face turned a bright red and water swelled in his eyes. Obviously embarrassed he ran upstairs.

Sasuke sighed, he went over and turned off the stove and moved the pan from the heated spot. He set down the bag and followed Naruto upstairs. Ino walked out from behind the wall.

"Did you get anything because Sasuke only 'hn'ed and ignored me." Ino asked sitting next to Sakura.

"Not really, but Naruto is reeeeeeeeeeeally weird."

"I'd say," Ino huffed.

"Why are you two here?" Sasuke walked over to the table from behind.

"Ummm, well, ummmm," Sakura started.

"We were just leaving!" Ino continued and grabbed Sakura and ran off.

Sasuke's eyebrow lifted and went back to his room to find Naruto, who by this point was tearing the room apart looking for something.

"Saaaaaaaaaaaaaasuke," Naruto dragged, " I need something to suck on!"

"Hn, what do you want to suck on then?"

"I want...I want..." An evil smile came over Naruto's face as he looked at Sasuke. "I want you."

-im-too-lazy-to-intsruct-naruto-giving-sasuke-a-blow-joooooooob-

"What do you think could be wrong with Naruto?" Ino lifted her hand to meet her chin in a perplexed way.

"I don't know, but what do you think he was doing at Sasuke-kun's house? I mean, he doesn't go over there just to cook does he?" Sakura suggested.

"Probably not, but...that food smelled really good, I guess I hoped I was gonna eat some of it..."

"Ino-pig, you eat so much, are you sure you should be with Shikamaru instead of Chouji?"

"Yes!" Ino shouted and huffed at the girl in disgust, "How dare you insult I and Shikamaru?!"

"_Sorry_," Sakura dripped and crossed her arms and started to think about Naruto again. If they were going to get anything from Naruto she highly doubted he would just tell anyone.

"I know!" Ino said, as if reading Sakura's mind she said, " Hinata and him have gotten really close maybe she could get something out of Naruto."

"You're right, Ino!" Sakura hooked on to Ino's arm, "Shall we?"

"We shall!" Ino thrilled, and they went off to she the wizard, the wonderful wizard of-oh, cough cough, Hinata of course.

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OMG! I finally updated! though its one of my newer stories so what? I hope you enjoyed reveiw! 


	3. Sasuke leaving with no warning

Okay! I...am bored. And I have to get a shot for STDs and some wierd cancer thing and I don't even have sex! Sure i write it but how do you get STDs from that?.! especially since the characters don't even have them!...-sigh- Anyways on with the story. Oh and I love you more those who write Sasunaru and **_NOT_** Narusasu were having a bad shortage of Sasunaru... -goes off and cries- I will loves yous even mores if you writes a mature Sasunaru for me because i'm desperate (and no angsty unless attempted suicide...) and I read any there that says sasunaru... (no offence to Narusasu lovers buuuuuuuut I'm a bad creature of habit and I learned Sasunaru not narusasu and I have read some narusasu but they're aren't appealing to me...at all.)

* * *

"No." This was definately the sternest the two girls have ever seen Hinata. She glared at them. Ino and Sakura looked at eachother as she started walking away. 

"But Hinata-chan, thats not nice keeping it a secret." Ino said.

"Look, you two girls ever think that she doesn't know either?" A voice came from behind them. Temari stood leaning on the concrete wall.

"Hi Temari." Sakura and Ino said in Unision.

"T-temari-kun y-you're here early." Hinata stuttered.

"Yes, all the better too." She commented. "Come on, I got a package I need to deliver to Uzumaki."

Sakura and Ino looked at eachother. "For Naruto-chan?" Sakura asked.

"Yeah..." Temari said. Hinata hooked her arm with Temari's and led them to Sasuke's. Sakura and Ino wondered to themselves how they knew that Naruto was at Sasuke's.

-------------woooooooooops---------------

"...And t-then they asked w-whats up with N-naruto-chan and Sasuke-kun." Hinata explained to Sasuke and Temari sat beside taking a sip of her tea.

"Yes, there was something Naru-chan wanted to tell you..." Sasuke contemplated, sitting back in his chair.

"Sasu-kuuuuuun, I'm home! Oh, hello Hinata, Temari! I'ves gots lots to tell you!" Naruto beamed.

"Alright," said Temari, "but first I have a package from Gaara for you." She handed the letter to Naruto.

Naruto quickly read it and had a brilliant red face by the time he was was done just reading it. He opened the package and pale before turning redder then a tomato about to pop in the oven.

"What did it..." Naruto shoved the paper and package into Sasuke and left. Hinata and Temari watched as Sasuke gave the object a questioned looked and how a red tinge painted his cheeks and a smirk crawl across his face as he read.

"Tell your brother thank-you and to send more soon. We'll be through them fast." Hinata and Temari gave eachother a 'what is in that box that is making them blush' look.

"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinata-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!" Naruto called from the living room. "Come here pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!"

Hinata, unquestioning, got up and went to the living. There was a "What?.!" Called out from the living room and a thump on the floor.

"Hinata-chan!" Sasuke and Temari heard Naruto gasp out. Temari looked at Sasuke who smirked. He started talking.

"I can trust you...you are with Hinata aren't you?" Temari nodded. "Naruto's pregnant, but don't tell anyone without Naruto's permission, I'm sure he told Gaara in the letter he wrote for him." Temari understood why Hinata fainted.

"But-how?"

"Gave him a pill."

Temari was silent before realization dawned...Sasuke was talking in a conversation! "You're very proud of this aren't you Uchiha?"

Sasuke just smirked and went to help Naruto with Hinata.

--------T&H-------

"Naruto was really happy when you said yes to being his child's godmother." Temari smiled and the girl who she had hooked arms with.

"Yes, and it was pretty funny how he went upstairs to get something and came back down with two of the same exact socks."

"Ah, but Hina-chan, they weren't. They were one point three nine four milimeters larger resulting in them coming from different packages." Hinata giggled.

"And then he chased Sasuke, all over the house for mismatching them...mmhee." Temari shook her head. Sasuke was gonna have one long year, this time around.

---ding dong ding---

"I think Gaara was kind to give us those sex toys." Sasuke said, laying in bed with Naruto, combing the mess of blonde hair with his fingers.

"But we can't even use them for the next few months..." Naruto sighed.

"Yes but once the baby is born...Wait," Sasuke got up and opened the window, standing there for a few moments before shooting a kunai at a random place.

"Nooooooooooooooooo! My book! Why oh why you my precious boooooooooooooooooook!.?" Someone cried from the trees. Naruto also got up and went to the window.

"Sasuke," Kakashi stated sitting on a new by branch and paused for effect, "HOW COULD YOU!.? You're a horrible human being! I haven't even finished reading that one yet..." Kakashi cried.

"What do you want Kakashi?" Naruto asked looking curiously at the dramatically crying man.

Kakashi looked up with a more serious face, "Tsunade has a mission for you."

----fweeeeeee----

"But-but Sasuke..."

"Dobe, it's only a three month mission, I'll be back four months before the baby is born." Sasuke zipped his bag.

Naruto had tears in his eyes, "But I'll miss you and want to be with you..."

Sasuke turned around and smiled. "I'll miss you, too, will you walk me to the gates?" Naruto nodded and they walked out of the door.

There was silence between them as they walked past the villagers until Hinata and Temari joined them. "Where you goin', Uchiha?" Temari asked noticing the bag.

"He has a three month mission, which he isn't gonna make it through." Everyone looked at Naruto.

"And why not dobe?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow. Temari and Hinata listen intently to the blonde.

"You'll see..." Naruto said and they finally reached the gate. Naruto gave Sasuke a hidden kiss and Sasuke did the same before leaving with the other Jounin on the mission.

"S-so Naruto-kun, wh-why won't Sasuke-san make it?" Hinata stammered.

"Wellllll...," Naruto started and looked over with an evil gleam flittering in his eyes." First he's going to have wierd dreams and then if he touched anybody the person he touched is gonna think he's going insane from his weird reaction and then he gonna have non stop shaking and maybe other side effects inbetween."

Temari and Hinata looked at him wierdly, "Why?" They asked in unision.

Naruto put his finger to his chin in thought. He smiled devishly at them, "It's a secret."

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Woo...okay there was ALOT of dialoge in this chappie...I'm trying nor to put somany ands sorry and well i apologize for anyother mistakes sooo...yeah reveiw. 


	4. end of first month

Okay I return, shelly is my new name for my friend who doesn't want to be told off...opps wrong fic (Im tooo lazy to back space...) Alright back to the ficcy...

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"Naruto-chan, what d-did you do to S-sasuke-san, anyways?" Hinata asked coming back from getting the lastest craving supplies. 

"Thanks," Naruto took the bag from her and walked into the kitchen. "I keep telling you, I didn't do anything to Sasuke. He brought it all upon himself..." Naruto muttered to himself before starting to prepare his food concoction.

"B-but how do y-you know this will happen to S-sasuke-san?"

Naruto stop and thought for a minute, setting down his utensils to tap his chin with his finger. He picked up the utensil again before replying, "Because I know Sasuke."

----

Naruto had told Kiba about the baby. He also told Kiba about how he'd like the mutt face to be his child's godfather. Kiba none-the-less accepted and told Shino. So from time to time they came to visit, and well this time they wish they hadn't.

"So again, why is Naru-chan throwing up?" Kiba asked Hinata who was with the two boys waiting outside the bathroom door.

"He has morning sickness, Kiba." Shino answered for her, for she was some how sleeping in that very uncomfortable crouching position.

They heard the toilet flush and Hinata's eyes snapped open as she slowly stood up, wiping her eyes. Naruto opened the door and walked out holding his stomach. "Uggggggh..." He dragged. He stumbled over to the bed and calasped. "Ugggggh..." He whined again.

"Naru-chan you feel...o...kay...?" Kiba slowed as he heard Naruto growl.

"Kiba! Do I _look _like I feel okay? I've got a fucking human growing in my fucking stomach, I can't stop throwing the fuck up and I feel like fucking shit! Does that answer your fucking question?.!" Naruto spat out.

"I'm sorry, Naru-chan...?" They looked at Naruto. Naruto dropped on the floor, tears were gathering in his eyes as he looked sadly at them.

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I'm sorry Kiba! Waaaaah! I want my Sasuke, the bed's so cold and nothings the saaame. Waaaaaaaaaaaaah! I'm a horrible friend!" Naruto cried. Kiba backed away from the swinging player.

"Naruto-san, do you want some ramen?" Shino asked hoping to calm Naruto. Well, it didn't calm him down at all but he had stopped crying and pulled everyone out of the room to Ichiraku's (sp?).

---

Naruto had slipped away to piss, Shino and Kiba stared at Hinata who was sleeping in her ramen. Kiba shook her shoulder. Hinata's head shot up making noodles and liquid fly everywhere.

"Hinata, are you okay?" Kiba asked.

"Yeah...yeah it's just Naru-chan has kept me up for the past few days running around the house with a blanket claiming the ghost of Charles Dwain is after him..." She yawned and laid her head back into the soup.

Kiba looked at Shino, "Who's Charles Dwain?"

Shino shook his head unknowingly before Naruto had returned.

"Hina-chan! Don't drown yourself!" Naruto shrieked. "I'm sorry it's all my fault! I'm sorry for keeping you up and msking you help me and and and-" And so the ranting went on until the could convince him against what he was saying... which took a while. Okay more like until Hinata started to talk in her sleepand said she stole the cookie from the cookie jar in which Naruto paused, stopped, starred and started to chase after the now fully awake Hinata.

-------With Sasuke-----

Sasuke woke up, it was the end of the first month of the mission and he'd had started to get strange dreams. He reached his warm sweaty hand to his forehead. He couldn't put his finger on it, but he was starting to feel...backed-up.

His chest puffed out as he sucked in a big breath of air. He got up and packed his sleeping bag. He walked over to the others at the camp fire. They all looked to him with a cat's curiousity.

"Sasuke-san, are you alright. You were yelling in your sleep." One of the guys asked.

"Hn." Sasuke said, ignoring them. He picked up a stick with a fish already in place to cook it. He held it over the fire and still ignored the others around him. He ate in silence, nibbling on the fish every now and then.

Sasuke finished and the others packed up and they went on there way to retrieve the special herbs from the village Tsunade was sending them to. They jumped branch to branch with practiced ninja skills.

Sasuke thought about it. They should be at the village in about a half a month from now, then be heading back. Sasuke hoped that the way back would be as easy as the way there.

Sasuke felt another chakra come toward them. He immediately stopped, as did the others. Soon more and more chakra was present. The troop looked around, preparing for a fight.

_So much for a smooth way up. _Sasuke thought.

----

They had minor injuriess from the mini war. Sasuke washed a gash with iodine before closing it with a bandage.

One of the guy's looked in his direction to see if he was ready and okay. Sasuke nodded. Once again they were on their way after disposing of the bodies.

Sasuke went back to thinking. This time he thought about Naruto. How big will Naruto's tummy be when Sasuke returned? Was he eating right? Was he okay? Who had he blabbered to?

Sasuke shook his head. He decided he needed to think about something else. He thought about his dream. It was weird.

I mean dreaming of my lil ponies humping each other is wierd right? Sasuke shivered at the thought. Why the hell did he dream of that? Why not Naruto under him, panting deep breaths that clouded in the cool winter's night as they made love under the stars on Sasuke's roof? Sasuke felt his pants. Maybe it wouldn't be good to think about dreams either.

Sasuke shook his head again, ignoring the weird stares he had gained from his team mates.

---

Sasuke smiled. The others were sleeping and he stood watch. He looked at the sky. What should they name the child.

If it was a girl, possibly Athena, goddess of war? Or if a boy, Loki, the god of mischief? No they were all too...Gawdy? Sasuke sighed.

What would he have to do for the baby? Feed it? Burp it? Change its diaper?

Sasuke shivered at teh thought of cleaning a child's dirty diaper. He would get Naruto to do that. But what if Naruto left for a few days on a mission? Naruto would definately want out of the house for a while to train or something as soon as he could.

A voice came from behind him. "Hey, Uchiha, your shifts up. My turn." It was the only girl on the mission. She was older and definitely had more experience in life. Her hair was turning gray.

Sasuke got up and went to his tent when right before he entered se called out : "Don't worry, changing diapers ain't that hard after you get used to it."

Sasuke blushed before hiding inside his tent. The lady let out a laugh and Sasuke wished he had Naruto to cuddle with right now.

* * *

Waaaaaaaaaaaah! I tried sooo hard this chappy! Its hard for me not to put "And" in every sentance...im stoopid like that... PS sorry for horrible grammer I was too bored to reread.  



	5. Sadist

Holy crapansies I have a angel. Her name be-ith Kurai the Angel and she's my BETA!

-Cries overdramatically- I'm so happy to have a goph-----A wonderful new friend that helps me with my fanfictions!

* * *

Kiba and Shino mildly wondered how Hinata dealt with Naruto for so long as she did. He acted like he was the baby instead of the thing inside...inside Naruto's womb! 

Naruto knew how he was acting though. He was very aware of the hyperactive energy he was having fun with by making everyone else's lives miserable. Oh, yes. The only way to deal with it was to make everyone else miserable.

Very, very miserable.

Oh, how he wished Sasuke were here. He vaguely wondered how off about his predictions were. Probably not much; he knew Sasuke as well as he knew himself if not better. Again he let out an unsatisfied sigh. Sasuke would keep him busy.

Very, very busy.

Smiling he looked at the two lovers tied with ropes and duct tape in the chairs, but not attached to them because Naruto figured he play with them like barbie dolls, but later found it would be funner if he had Shikamaru's shadow jutsu thingies. Oh their sweet moans of imprisonment-- it almost made Naruto hard. No one could ever say duct tape wasn't useful. If anything duct tape was the real God here. It had the ability to practically fix anything -- or make anything suffer.

Naruto set a glance on the two prisoners again. The looks on their faces had fear, lots of it, almost so much it hit Naruto what was happening to Sasuke was happening to him.

They just had different ways of dealing with it.

Naruto sighed. He wondered if he could get up with porn.

No.

He wondered if he could get his two house guest up on porn.

Porn would be fun, and great.

Really really great.

In fact it was so great he grabbed his jacket and walked out the door, calling out "I'm going out for some gay porn to use against you, be back in an hour!"

Naruto smiled and went to the nearest store that he knew sold porn. He'd have to make sure he kept his child away from Kakashi when he was almost done with a book.

Oh, his child!

He rubbed his bump of a tummy. He was kind of hungry, but even so he continue on thinking about his child.

It would be a girl. He could feel it. She'll have Sasuke's grace and almond shaped eyes, hopefully she'd have his blue eye color, darker and more beautiful with features of her own. She'll be cunning and kind and oh so very smart.

He closed his eyes walking down the forest pathway to the village.

If it was a boy, if the baby turned out stupid and clumsy, Naruto still could only wish for it to be healthy. That truly was the only thing that mattered.

"Hey Naruto," Sakura called out, her lover, Lee, and her best friend Ino by her side. "What's up?"

"Ah, Naruto! The story of youth Sakura and Ino must know has not been told to the unpromised youth!" Lee cut in, he knew his love, always so outgoing and youthful like as she always chose the hard way to go about things.

"Lee!" Sakura and Ino called out, embarrassed by his strait forward blutnliness.

Naruto looked at Lee smiling. He loved Lee, as a friend, and it would be a challenge to drive him mad. "Buy me ramen."

-----

Sasuke thoughts were only on Naruto. Every time someone touched him it was Naruto. Naruto sliding his hands over his arms, Naruto there right next to him. Naruto, Naruto, NARUTO!

Oh God, he loved Naruto.

It wasn't something nessecarily new to him but, oh God.

He hated Naruto.

He bet Naruto knew. Naruto knew this was going to happen. God dammit.

He was never going on a long term mission without Naruto there to explain everything.

He was going insane!

He curled down and covered his ears with his hands. He only had to wait another thirty days, sixteen hours, twenty-thr--two minutes, fourty-six seconds and thirteen milliseconds.

Oh, yeah, he was going to die.

His internal clock kept ticking and ticking away as he stood there in a semi fetal position alone in the hotel as the rest of his team went to get the scroll.

Shit, Sasuke thought, they'll be back soon.

His breath came out shacky as he stood and waited for his team.

Letting out an uncharistic cry he shouted, "I'm going to die!"

----

"Here's another!" Naruto vouched as he finished the bowl of ramen and placed it on the stack of bowls that teeter-tottered on Lee's foot.

Lee wiped his brow, and motioned to put his other arm down to help him balance.

"No, no Lee!" Naruto scolded. "You want your lovely lady to hear the secret everybody but her and her best friend knows about, hmm? You gotta keep your promise to balance twenty-six bowls on your foot while doing a handstand on one hand. That was only the twenty-third one. Three to go!"

Sakura, Ino and the rest of the restaurant looked mortified at Lee and Naruto as Naruto continued onto the next bowl. He ate it painfully slow as he watched Lee suffer.

He finished it and placed it on Lee's stack. Taking in a breath he started to walk away from Lee.

"Stay there Lee. I'm not hungry anymore so don't move until you have two more bowls on there and take a picture or until I get back to eat some more!" Naruto sang-song out of the restaurant, ignoring Sakura's raging calls to get his ass back in there and get Lee to stop.

Naruto smiled and gave her a wave of a birdy and left the restaurant. The bookstore caught his attention.

Oh, yes the porn!

------

Shino couldn't help but growl at Kiba--through the duct tape -- for getting up so easy off of seeing some random naked guys.

Naruto of course made it the way by making them face each other so the could see how happy they were. He himself was happy, but not in the same way Kiba was.

"Bondage your thing Kiba? Makes sense, I suppose, being part doglike and all. Gotta have those chains and collars around all the time, no? There something to look forward to, Shino." Naruto said, flipping the page and watching Kiba grow more happy. Shino was, too, though Naruto was pretty sure it was because of the way Kiba looked.

Naruto wondered if you could replace something with air using the replacement jutsu. He'd have to try it on Sasuke when he got back, maybe it'll save their clothes. Probably not.

He looked at the page and all happiness was lost. If only he were like Kiba, able to get an erection from seeing pictures.

Naruto let the magazine fall down on a page that he flipped through and found with bondage leaving it in Kiba's view and leaving the room.

Only a month more to go.

* * *

But, for seriously, I have to thank her for wasting her time on my patheticness. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! 


End file.
